20 Mar 2010

What makes a real man Mr Lebowski?

There are countless films about women, discussing things of the heart, endless shopping sprees and gossiping about potential partners, but the bigger picture actually looks at what it is to be a woman. I don't know what makes a woman, mostly because I'm not one. Biologically women are very different to men, but both require certain traits to divide the sexes. Men need to be manly, girls need to be girly, or you might turn heads for all the wrong reasons. However, in my short existence I have noticed how the rules are changing.

As women become more independent, although 'become' is probably the wrong word, because if you show me a women that doesn't strive for independence, I'll show you a man who looks forward to doing the dishes. The divide between the sexes has become blurred in a society where all things are (or should be, we're evolved beings aren't we?) tolerated. Things still make me shake my head and wonder how the individuals emitting them chose their styles and mindsets, and what on earth influenced them to make the decisions they have.

So that brings me to my question, what does make a real man?

As a fellow much wiser than myself once wrote for a film,

"Is it being prepared to do the right thing, whatever the cost? Isn't that what makes a man?"
"Hmmm... Sure, that and a pair of testicles."

Technically my friend the Dude was right, a pair of testicles does make a man, but so does watching a bit of sport, drinking beer with your friends and discussing things that come to mind, whether you've thought it through or not. Putting another slab of red meat on the braai, pouring yourself another whiskey and sitting down to watch the late game on a Saturday. We go to music shows, we watch chick flicks with our girlfriends / partners / wives without expecting them to sit through the latest 'skop, skiet en donner' with the most realistic and gory special effects 'ever'.

We're simple creatures, we don't need much, an occasional smile, a surprise cup of coffee or a pre-rolled cigarette when you get in after a long day at the office, these things will suffice. Pampering a woman is a given lads, this is not optional. Don't treat them like you would one of the boys, Jagermeister might not be her drink of choice. Let her choose her own poison, unless she opts for a Jagermeister, and if she does, count your blessings my friends.

Thing is, I believe a 'man' is someone that embraces all the things our modern society has to. Go along to Fashion Week, go see the latest Hugh Grant film on a Saturday afternoon and stop round the pub on your way home for a pint or two and the last 15 minutes of the game. Take her for that bunny chow she proclaims to 'never eat', she'll enjoy it, because let's face it, bunny chows are the bollocks. (And yes, you do get vegetarian chows.)

So why not go and do something you wouldn't normally do with a lady friend? That readers, is what I think makes a man, someone that can compromise, someone that can surprise and of course a pair of testicles. This too ladies, is not optional, literally or figuratively speaking.



  1. OMG. Are you taken because I think you're MR RIGHT.

  2. For you, I'm always available.